Dear Mona Eltahawy

Dear Mona Eltahawy,
We, the undersigned women of the Middle East, are writing to publicly thank you for your continuous pursuit of justice in our name and on our behalf. Though we may be weak of body after suffering relentless crimes against us by the barbaric men of this region we are strong of mind, through you. If it was not for your selfless willingness to shout down, ridicule and label all men of the Middle East as misogynistic we certainly would not be where we stand today, on both of our feet.

Though you may have usurped our voices without our consent and begun marketing yourself as having the authority to speak on behalf of all Muslim and Arab women, we contend that we could not have found a better self-appointed media darling.

And as such, you may selectively apply what little rights we, as women of the Middle East, have, such as our choice of dress, but we are just internally oppressed victims. You know best, Mona.
You are blessed with the support and admiration of the most evolved and intelligent creature on Earth: the white man. And you have used that support to shine a beacon of hope on our future, as we patiently wait for the white man to rescue us.

Furthermore, the platform of mainstream media has projected your voice on our behalf to hundreds of thousands, perhaps even millions. You skillfully package our circumstances into one easy-to-swallow formula—sometimes it’s hate, sometimes it’s culture, sometimes it’s religion, sometimes it’s all three!

Despite having condensed our complex plight into a merchandisable made-for-television sob-story, wherein we are forced into the role of damsel in distress whilst all Middle Eastern men are the villains, you seem to be garnering much support; especially from the ever accommodating, well-intentioned white man, who, according narrative, plays the role of devoted hero.

At last here we are, awaiting your direction, your shining light, to guide us towards the path of liberation. A path we had never dreamed would be possible to access, were it not for your efforts to rid the world of the savagery that is the Arab man wherever you find it. Despite having witnessed alliances between man and woman in the Middle East, who have often fought alongside one another, we understand that we may be oppressed beyond our own belief. That the oppression has rotted our very minds and blinded us from reality, that the men of the Middle East are nothing more than savage brutes, unable to feel anything besides hatred towards us.
Again, dearest Mona, we thank you, on bended knee, for attempting to free us from bondage. We could not have ever imagined a more noble, qualified liberator. We pray that you also deliver the following message, one which comes from the depths of our very souls, to your closest friend and ally, the white man:

We thank you, dearest white savior, for neglecting to address the ‘war on women’ in your own region, in order to watch us, the women of the Middle East, progress. Shamefully, we have not yet even begun to repay you for freeing us from bondage with your bullets and uranium tipped bombs in places such as Iraq, Yemen, Pakistan and Afghanistan. We are forever indebted.

Mona, may you continue in your fight for media slots and nods of acceptance from mainstream media outlets, despite a slew of Arab women from all walks of life refuting your oversimplification of our plight. We pray that you continue to close your ears and eyes to logical rebuttals of your articles, as you pursue complete dominion over our voices, a pursuit done only out of the kindness of your own heart and on our behalf.

Thank you dearest Mona. We remain forever silently yours, awaiting your call for us to advance in the war against the barbaric men of the Middle East. We raise our chains in thanks and pray that one day we will meet in a free Middle East, where you will be hailed as our deliverer.

the oppressed women of the Middle East.

  1. Each expression in this post is pure brilliance!
    A pleasure to read,

    – Another ‘Muslim-and-oppressed-female’ from Pakistan 😀

  2. Maryam said:

    Thank you for your post.

    It’s part of what I thought myself. She is the darling of the media west (they are sooo often confused on exactly how to market Muslim women in the ‘west’)

    Add my P.S. to Dear Mona,
    You’re not the Gloria Steinman of the ME gurrl friend, you’re not.
    You’re just here for the fame & notoriety kid, and you know it.

  3. Melone said:

    Brilliant rebuttal! In my opinion it was about time. She is just an embedded intellectual.

    Full solidarity from a Southern Italian, precarious and migrant.

  4. i have read this three times now! I love it more and more every time I read it 🙂 amazing!

  5. Orbala said:

    This really is the best, most creative response to the whole phenomenon! Thank you for a laughter much needed.

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